Cooking for a humble family of two-part 1

On taste

Cooking for 2 is more than multiplying a one-person portion by two; it’s also about reaching a daily agreement on our different tastes. When I was in college, I lived in a house with Penhleak and Anna who love to cook and eat. But we unanimously agreed to cook separate meals because we knew we wanted to eat different things at different times, cooked in our own way. After all, dealing with school work and project teammates was work enough, at least let us have our way with food. 

Yup! We cook, ate, worked, hung out, messed around in the Kitchen a lot! 

Cooking and eating when Ming and I were dating was more of an occasion and not a daily chore. Apart from impressing him by showing 'this is what I can make'! It was also an intimate moment of letting this person know more about you. In a cheesy way of saying this is, 'I want to show you my world, and on top of that, I want you to taste it."  I would make him my favourite dishes and also replicate food he told me he liked. Through food we share stories, experiences, and flavors of the past and present. 

I don't make or eat guacamole often but Ming told me he made and ate a lot when he was in school. Finally last summer he made some so I can try his blend :)

But now that we are sharing everyday meals together, there are permanent adjustments we have to make. In a way, it is forgoing some sort of individual freedom; but on the other side, we open up doors to countless innovations, possibilities and fun challenges. Our most fundamental difference in taste will be soups and starches... I LOVE hot soups or stews, with noodles, pastas or rice. I love how your body warms up after slurping hot soup, and everything in the soup is soft, mushy, and filling. I don't think Ming wants to eat that everyday, he doesn't care much for starch, and he likes things crunchy and fresh. A meal to him means a solid portion on a plate, not water in a bowl, and he loves fruit. I never cared for fruit, don't know why, just never did.

I guess, in a nice way and not so nice way, we're forced out of our routines. I started cooking more solid dishes, like baked fish, roasted vegetables, and stir-fry noodles. And he's introduced to the wonderful world of soups and stews. 

As we started developing this new style of eating, we also started re-exploring foods that we previously did not like. Ming does not like beans because they are starchy and fiberous. So I tried dicing them up and mixing them in rice or other stir-fries. Then Ming got all excited about these pea tendrils he got from the farmer's market, my insides cringed when he bought it.... I never tried it, but a pea-tasting plant just doesn't sound right in my head. but oh well, I guess we'll give it some tries?!
In the process of exploring and trying new things, I often used methods, tastes and ingredients that were not from my heritage Chinese cooking. They were acquired from TV shows, youtube cooking channels, online recipes, cooking with friends from different cultures and backgrounds, and sometimes my own intuition kicks in. Cooking and eating in the US is definitely very international and interesting. I bet if I cooked and ate with a person from hong kong, our taste and habits might be a lot more similar. A typical dinner includes blanched or stir fried veggies, steamed meat or fish, two or three stir-fries made with tofu, mushrooms, tomatoes, peppers or eggplants... all shared family style eaten with plain rice. I'm glad these rules don't apply to Ming and I, for now, this humble family of two doesn't have a dinner routine yet. Come to think of it, it is a big commitment agreeing to eat in a certain style everyday for the rest of your life. Of all the advises Ming and I got before we tied the knot, why didn't we get any wise words on the subject of taste adjustment?

Food is Awesome!

So in between driver's ed, writing, cleaning, and knitting, I cook and I eat. Come to think about it, we sometimes rarely think about what we eat, and sometimes we spend too much energy on our food. This disparity in our food thought totally fascinates me. Why do we automatically prefer to get stuff with 'organic' printed on the package without really thinking about what that means, and why haute restaurants who go all out of their way to re-invent food become popular eateries? My experience in the past three weeks really got me thinking about where food can bring us.
People who know me now see me as a crazy food-lover, she loves what she eats, cares about food, studies food. But hasn't always been like that. I did not start cooking until I three years ago, growing up I was a docile child eating whatever my housekeeper or mother prepared.
I clearly remember this one incident happening when I was four: I came back from nursery school and my mom was too busy to cook lunch. So she bought a lunch box for me, probably from a Hong Kong bbq place.

Something like that

While I was eating, my mom asked, "Do you like it?" (referring to the food) "Yes!" (referring to the styrofoam box) I did not know what I was eating and I really did not care what I was eating. Food is food, I eat what my parents feed me. But the box! It was so cool! The point of my story was, we are socialized to the idea of taste. We were taught to care about what we eat, and how it tastes. As we grew up eating and making food from our cultures, then taste and your demand for that taste develops.
My second experience really contrasts the first: two weeks ago, we went to a really nice restaurant to celebrate a good friend's birthday. It is a real treat, we got a multi-course tasting menu where we get delicate morsels of CAREFULLY prepared food. From selecting ingredients, to executing their cooking techniques, to presentation...

That's not what I ate but you get the picture

The dinner was delightful and the food delicious. However, it was also a baffling experience, every ingredient transformed, and looked and tasted differently. Even though I love cooking and eating, after that dinner I couldn't help but question, are we making too much a fuss to what we eat?

That question opened another floodgate of questions in my head. This was quite unsettling, because I want to pursue a career related to food and community building, and suddenly I felt like I don't know what food means to people anymore. Is eating about being with friends and sharing a meal together? Is eating purely about the search for the next great flavor, next sensation? Is food about tradition, cooking what our mother, grandmother use to make, to learn about our history and heritage? Is it about exchange, mixing of cultures, and bridging differences and borders? Is it about being sustainable, and cooking within the means of our resources? Is it about health, thinking about what we put in our body and how that affects us? 


But food is all the above! And I guarantee we all have countless experiences where food has served all these functions. For a while I was concerned if we have forgotten what great things we can do through food because we were too busy making food taste interesting or look cool, but I don't think that is possible. There is so much history behind our personal and collective food cultures that we always eat for multiple reasons, never just for taste. 


So quickly I made my peace with food: last Sunday, Ming and I went to Sunday brunch with friends at a small Mexican restaurant. The weather was great, the place was warm and friendly, Mexican food was not popular in Hong Kong so I did not eat it growing up. But sitting there digging into a simple burrito, with great company and conversations, not guilty about calories because this is a 2 meal in 1 brunch... I think to myself, food is awesome!
 

Saving pumpkins

Pumpkins... let me go back from the start: these pumpkins were a surprise gift from my worm bin... as if somehow the worms knew they wouldn't be with me for much longer, they gave me a portable version of nature as my new friend and companion...

Early this spring, when I opened my compost bucket, there were pumpkin sprouts! 

At first when I took these baby pumpkins in they're like vampires. Since they grew up in a dark environment,  if you put them under the sun for 15 mins, they shrivel and wilt... So everyday I put them under the sun for a little while longer, it's amazing to see how sun helps plants grow.

At the airport with my pumpkins, tough ride but they made it!

Thanks to Anna's old basil pot, I was able to take some of my pumpkins with me when I moved to San Francisco earlier last month. It must have been horrible for pumpkins flying cross-country, no sun, crappy air, cold air-conditioning... but they made it. tucked safely under the seat infront of me all the way. However, challenges didn't stop there. Although Ming has a balcony in his apartment, outside was so windy it snapped one of my thick pumpkin vines clean off its stem. Talk about heartbreak! The apartment has good lighting inside but not the direct sunlight that my pumpkins love and need. Yesterday, I saw new leaves growing out from my pumpkins were in a pale yellow color, that moment I panicked. I spent last night tossing and turning in bed thinking of mini-greenhouses I can built with household supplies... cling wrap, tape, sticks...?! Anything that can shield the pumpkins from strong wind but doesn't affect them from getting sun. The solution might be simpler than that.

This morning I looked up and remembered there's a ceiling window at the hallway of our apartment, so I plompt the pumpkin right under it... it might take a couple of days to see results, but for now, it seems happy :) 

Come on pumpkins, photosynthesize!

Yesterday I transplanted the pumpkins into a bigger pot, the goal is to get them big and strong enough to be an outdoor plant (they can't be house plants forever) I fully intend to make pumpkin pie from them in the future... hehehe

Starting a life in California...

2? 3? weeks ago I graduated from Skidmore College with a bunch of classmates/friends... then a week later Ming and I got married in Lake George. Two days after that I moved from New York, to San Francisco... Wow! That was fast.

I guess life doesn't stop there, I have tonnes to do: unpack, learn how to drive, write post-wedding thank you notes, cook?... I hope by writing a blog I can keep in touch with everyone who's on their way to realize their dreams. Things happen so fast that I can barely keep up sometimes, I miss you guys and I want to be loud and ridiculous around you all once in a while... so can we keep in touch?